Courtney's Message on Pain

My girl Courtney sent this to the Gulag Email one day in response of my blog entry. I still read it at work almost all the time and thought I would share it with everyone else.

Quote from The PROPHET by Khalil Gibran

And a woman spoke, saying, "Tell us of Pain."

And he said:
Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding.
Even as the stone of the fruit must break, that its heart may stand in the
sun, so must you know pain.

And could you keep your heart in wonder at the daily miracles of your life,
your pain would not seem less wondrous than your joy;

And you would accept the seasons of your heart, even as you have always
accepted the seasons that pass over your fields.

And you would watch with serenity through the winters of your grief.

A life without pain is no life at all. I have felt the pain of all kinds, physical, emotional the death of a close friend and family member. There is also the pain of letting that one special someone slip away without a fight.

White Knight,

Happy Halloween 2006

Well folks its almost Halloween again, a holiday most people have forgotten the meaning of at this point. I have been thinking about it a lot lately and how its changed since I was a kid. I hear parents talking about sending the kids out around 4pm and home by 6pm.

When we were young we didn't go out till it got dark and didn't come home till almost 11pm or so. People were still handing out candy and scaring everyone at that hour. Now we live in a society where everyone to too afraid to go out the door because the bogeymen has become real. I ask that we remember the days that once were. There are no more "crazies" or "bogeymen" now then there was 20 years ago. Only difference now is that we know more about them.

Happy Halloween everyone.
White Knight,

Misconceptions

We are all guilty of them, we have all made them. Its doesn't make you a bad person its simply ignorant.
Recently I have a misconception of my own reversed once I got to know this person. As it would turn out she is actually very interesting and not the pretentious little ***** I thought she was.

Of course through our conversations she has learned of her own misconceptions on regards to me and my personality. Needless to say my reputation precedes me.

Misconceptions are the easiest mistake to make, we are all told not to judge a book by its cover but lets face it there is no other way. There is a brief description on books for that exact reason. Sure you cannot judge a person simply by looking at them but that doesn't mean you won't try.

Side Note:
Be honest with people in the world, if you have something to get off your chest then do it, don't hold it in for no good reason. Only person who hurt when you hold in your feelings is yourself.

White Knight,

Green Eyed Monster

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O, beware, my lord, of jealousy!
It is the green-eyed monster which doth mock
The meat it feeds on.
"Othello", Act 3 scene 3
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Jealousy is a bizarre human emotion or perhaps chemical response. Animals will not suffer from this the same way we do. For instance we will see someone that we have interest in and then decide we are no longer interested. But if that person were to look at someone else the green eyed monster would rear its ugly head.

I have been known to be very territorial, what can I say its a character flaw. Jealousy is very odd, its popped to mind the other day and I just shook my head within the context of the situation.

White Knight,

What do women want?

I am sure most of us have seen the movie with Mel Gibson "What Women Want."

I really want to know what women want from a man. Do you want to be treated like crap, be taken advantage of and ignored. Do you enjoy being slapped around?

I cannot figure it out for the life of me. I watch beautiful, intelligent women stay with men who just don't care. The question is why?

What is the attraction? When you do find a good man who will treat you right and be a gentleman you leave him for the same asshole as before. Please ladies answer my call, tell me why you do it and what you really want.

White Knight,

The Beast Within

Today was not a good day at work. I was having a great day and then I had to deal with a really bad customer. She simply pushed me over the edge I was ready to snap.

Once it was over it was lunch time so I had some time to cool off. I was still shaking later into the night. I hate this feeling, I can feel the beast within clawing his way out of me. In my case the beast within being uncontrolled rage.

I have not felt fear like that in a long time. A feeling of losing control and not being able to get it back. I would never intentionally hurt someone, I am a very peaceful man but when the anger inside creeps out bad things can happen.

The beast within will remain caged for as long as I can control it. I do not fear much in this world, but losing control is the greatest fear I have.

White Knight,

Movie Review

Silent Hill
There is not much to say about Silent Hill. It would get my ranking of Worst Episode Ever. The effects were great, but the story line and acting was bad. I do not recommend this movie to anyone.

Stay Alive
This movie was great. Any major gamer may be a little freaked out by the whole idea but for me it gets a big two thumbs up. Very well done, great story new and original concept.

National Lampoons Dorm Daze 2
If you like college stupidity followed up with Tits and Ass this is the movie for you. There is not much else you can say about it.

Click
Adam Sandler is awesome in this movie. Great concept and it really makes you think about your work and how much you should give to it. Also his wife in the movie was smoking hot, always a perk.

Regards,
White Knight

The Dream

This song was done on the Drew Carey show. I do not know why but for some reason I really like it.

Look at me, I'm fifty-three
A factory has got the best of me
In Cleveland, Ohio
Got a mortgage to pay, I got a lawn to mow
In Cleveland, Ohio
Jeans of blue, waist forty-two
My baseball cap has Chief Wahoo
In Cleveland, Ohio
Humidity is up around 90 or so
In Cleveland, Ohio
And when my workday's through I barbecue
Put the kids to bed and make love to you
In Cleveland Ohio
I was born there, I'll probably die there
Hope it doesn't snow
In Cleveland, Ohio

*****************************************
My favorite part is right here:
And when my workday's through I barbecue
Put the kids to bed and make love to you
*****************************************
I suppose that is all you really want in the end. A happy life.

White Knight,

Cursed with Bad judgment

I was once known as the Buddha of Love, no not because I had a belly but because I was good at fixing other peoples relationship problems. You had a problem tell me about it and I could probably fix it.
There is only one problem with that, I couldn't fix my own. I have been cursed with bad judgment in recent days I have made some serious mistakes that may cost me both a very good friend and a possible life time companion.

There is really nothing I can do at this point to fix the damage that was caused, I can only hope it repairs itself and that the fates give me a second chance with this one. Some say life is full of second chances, I sure hope that's true.

White Knight,

Karma Directions

In my life time I have seen many opportunities slip past. Made the wrong choice or just didn't see it coming. Now I have the chance to get something very special and I am screwing it up for myself.

Like all great stories in life it has to be about a woman. Words cannot describe the feelings I have for her. Six months ago I made a choice and as you can see from previous posts the choice did not work out. The lady I am talking about was the choice not picked. Now She looks at me as though I am on the rebound which I can understand. I have no interest in hurting her in anyway.

The closeness or her touch overwhelms my senses like nothing I have experienced before. We were together the other night and the only thing I could think of was "I love you" but I couldn't say it. Why? Because I did not want to hurt her, it was too soon. She wants to be there for me as a friend which is great because you can never have too many of those, but she also seems to want more then that. Now she seems confused about what she really wants. I do not know if its me getting out of a relationship or perhaps its her best friend that she doesn't want to lose. There are so many questions and never enough answers.

I know I care deeply for her, more then she even knows and if its time she needs I would give her all the time in the world. I am sure she will be reading this and hopefully her head does not explode. Now I am questioning whether or not to even publish this...

White Knight,

Miscellaneous Humor

This was found in the devils dictionary.
LOVE, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage or by removal of the patient from the influences under which he incurred the disorder.

C use to say to me that she did not like the cut of my Jib. This is what was found in an online dictionary. Simply priceless.

cut of one's jib

One's general appearance or personality, as in I don't like the cut of Ben's jib. In the 17th century the shape of the jib sail often identified a vessel's nationality, and hence whether it was hostile or friendly. The term was being used figuratively by the early 1800s, often to express like or dislike for someone.

White Knight,

Questions

So I am now officially single again, needless to say I am not impressed about it. There are so many questions and yet I have no answers to them. Sometimes life takes you for a loop, or sometimes your the bug and sometimes your the windshield. I suppose this time I was the bug.

I do not know where it went wrong. It hit a rough patch but that is easily recovered. The hardest part was when she told me that she saw no future with me. Talk about sticking the knife in and twisting.

I hold no ill will or feelings toward my past love. She made her choice which is not a crime. At this point I hope she returns to me once things are back to normal but I shall not hold onto that dream to tightly.

The world is full of questions and all I am asking for is a few simple answers. When you look up into the stars and beg the gods to show mercy upon you or grant you just one request... Well you get the idea.

Here is to the end of another chapter in the book of life.

Best Regards,
White Knight